God is just so damn awesome!

God truly is awesome, hey... even with all this crap in my life at the moment... internal as well as external, God is always with me. At this moment, when everything has gone from bad to worse, I am at complete peace...not even just peace, but contentment... as weird as that is. I've been praying pretty hardcore, and I will continue to do so... hopefully it'll become a habit for not just the bad times. I am completely trusting in God as far as my future goes, and hey, if it doesn't pan out, I know that He's got better in store for me anyway. I still believe in what I believe, but if it doesn't come to pass then so be it.

Hebrews 11:1 'Now faith is the reality of things being hoped for, the proof of things not being seen...' A really good definition of faith... one of my favorite verses in fact. I have things to hold onto, even though at the moment they are definitely unseen.

Hebrews 11:33 'Who through faith subdued kingdoms, wrought righteousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions...' so God rewards faith. I believe that even if we are mistaken, God still rewards our faithfulness by taking us out of the situation gracefully. In fact in faith, it's all good, so really I should have no worries at all. And at the moment I don't, so 'tis good..ness?

About my moodiness, well, the last big bout I had with it was on Sunday, over Amelia leaving youth band. It kinda caught me by surprise, but I was prepared for it, coz I figured it was going to happen sooner or later. I was on a pretty big downer all night because of it, even though looking back on it now it seems pretty dumb. I remember thinking about halfway through, 'well, why am I depressed?, it's not like I didn't know this was going to happen...' I couldn't come up with any answers really, so I thought for a bit and the only thing that stuck was that it felt good to be depressed. As weird as that is, I was using the depression to feel good, instead of focusing on and trusting in God. If I look at any time I've gotten depressed now, I can say yeah, those reasons are more like selfish excuses, now. It's really selfish when I look back now. Thankfully God has changed my mindset, although I pray that He will help me to continue to change, because I don't think I'm there yet...

So yeah, how good is The Man anyway? ... I did have something to write right about now, but I've totally forgotten what it is... so yeah... I'll leave you all now and go watch Kingdom of Heaven..which I've been meaning to watch since about 2 hours ago!!

Cheerio, D-Man