God is awesome. I really feel like I've had a breakthrough at this time. I haven't felt this good in at least 6 months. I don't know really why..the timing is wierd, but yeah..it's good. Mood in a word: excited. Music in the background: Replenish - Underground. Just listening to it takes me back, and I can remember very clearly. It was a Monday during the holidays last year. I was sitting at the sound desk about half an hour before something. The sun was shining and I had just brought 3 new CDs, which this was one of. This was before camp last year...I was listening to it for the very first time, and I seem to remember Matty coming in for something.
I've read through The Sacred Romance and Journey of Desire by John Eldredge..yeah I know, I'm a John Eldredge freak...get over it! lol, he rocks. Anyway, one of the things that came up briefly in the former and explored in the latter was this idea of a 'haunting'. Memories of times when your heart was lifted and there didn't seem to be a problem in the world, when you were at peace...memories of times when you simply didn't want them to end. Different things trigger these memories, ie. for me it's music in a big way, I don't think I can really listen to any of my albums without remembering something...it can be other things though, I can remember big things like camp from certain smells sometimes..yeah..anyway...
My mood isn't dependent on the music however...it's just God's grace. I can't say enough how awesome God is!
Manifest was awesome despite the first day being really kinda...not so good. The second day more than made up for it. I really learned a lot from the different streams and I think I picked the right ones:
Creative Ministries - Sidney Mohedhe
Worship Leading - Henry Seeley
Drums & Bass - Dave Nygaard & Ben
Leadership - Bram Manusama
Youth Bands - Henry Seeley
Song Writing - Ben Manusama
There was heaps of material, and I have been applying some of it in Illuminus & worship already.
I've decided to put in each blog entry a memory with as much detail as I can, so if I forget, I can always reference it :) so..here goes...
Manifest:
Saturday: I got up at 5:00am..still dark...and had a shower, walked over to Mils' place at around 6:00am. Started zoning just sitting on the couch. Michelle and Brad took ages to get there from picking up Matty. I was absolutely smashed...my state was pretty much summed up by these words at Maccas: "Why don't you...drop it...every time then?"..trust me, it was demented.. The worship that morning, in the stadium, everyone was going absolutely mental! God was in the house and He anointed the worship leaders up the front. The first song was One Way - United...as soon as I heard it smashed as I was, I was like "Nup, going up the front!" I really let go and worshiped God with everything I had. That afternoon, the sun was fairly hot overhead. We went out onto the grassy field to eat lunch. Me and Sam on a spur of the moment did a run-around into the oval underneath the sprinklers. Didn't get that wet, but I was damp for a while. I laid on the ground almost the entire time and covered my eyes with my arms. I left five minutes before my stream started because of the conversation topic..yeah Sam..you! lol!! My first stream for the day was Youth Bands, it was really good and practical..so I'm not going into to much detail here...I have the notes. Second stream was song writing. Ben Manusama had a really different approach to writing songs. He went in depth into the lyrical structure of songs..one example he used was Rock of Ages..others were, Adonai, All Honor, etc. The drive home was pretty anticlimactic...we stopped at Maccas for tea, Sam freaked out some Greek family or something. I slept most of the way home. At some point Mils' put Johnny Cash on...that's when I fell asleep :P...but we had United We Stand and Blessed on for most of the car trip. We got home by about 8:00pm.
Okies, this is a seriously long blog entry...
Cheerio, D-Man
Monday 27 March 2006
Friday 24 March 2006
Manifest, music and my life
Well, hmm, lets see...Isn't it funny how my titles usually have three words and they all start with the same letter? Yeah..anyway...it's been a while since my last blog entry, a fair bit has happened. I've made some decisions in my life to live by faith, and so far it's a really rocky road. I've been coming to recognize the attacks of the enemy for what they are. My life hasn't really gotten any better on the outside...it probably won't.
I've been reading John Eldredge's book, 'Waking the Dead' about coming back to a fullness of heart and hoping for the future. It's a very good book, and one that has sparked my decision. I think I have some very tough things to go through, which is gonna suck, but I'm holding onto the promise of God for my future...and other things. How I wish things could be different. How I wish things could be as they were, but I know it's never going to happen, even as I know that dwelling on the past is not good either.
I know there are things in my life that I have to let God deal with before I can really go anywhere, so I think I have a pretty tough road ahead of me for a while...but at least I'll be awesome when He's done aye? : ) ... or better anyway. I've been under fire pretty hardcore lately, and I haven't really felt that I can tell anyone because no-one seems to understand exactly what I'm going through. I'm not even sure I really can, and I can't really put into words anyway, I guess. I've decided to have a little 'character growth' in my life, just trying to be a bit more stable than I have been...eg. rather than bringing everyone down with moodiness, I'm giving my circumstances to God and (trying to) rejoicing in Him anyway.
These last few weeks have been pretty hectic...I've literally not had a night to myself all week, and been surviving on an average of 7 hours sleep a night, except for last night when I had to made do on 2 because of Manifest. To be honest, the first day of manifest wasn't that great. The worship was totally awesome in the morning just after rego, but the day was a real drag after that. I don't know whether this had to do with my lack of sleep or what, but I just couldn't really get into it.
Some good music has come out recently, aww yeah....The new United album 'United We Stand' has FINALLY arrived...and totally rocks my socks, also MuteMath's self-titled debut album. Very chill. Very very chill. Fully awesome. Better than Coldplay...and that's saying something. I figured out the connection between Adam LaClave (Macrosick) and Paul Meany (MuteMath) What made them tick together as Earthsuit...Adam came up with all the funky junk rock licks and high energy whilst Paul was more focused on the mellow, arty, chill expressions in their songs. Now that they have become their own bands..it is really easy to tell where Earthsuit got it's sound from. Plumb's new album 'Chaotic Resolve' has also recently come out. I picked it up completely by accident, but it is very cool. A cross between Evanescence and Sixpence None the Richer for sound, and it works really well. Also Building 429's new album 'Rise' has been ordered...hopefully it won't take to long to get here...anyway...rather than boring you with more muso crap that no-one but myself is interested in.. I'll leave you with a proverb.
"If those who know don't say anything, then those who don't know will."
Cheerio, 'lil D-Man
I've been reading John Eldredge's book, 'Waking the Dead' about coming back to a fullness of heart and hoping for the future. It's a very good book, and one that has sparked my decision. I think I have some very tough things to go through, which is gonna suck, but I'm holding onto the promise of God for my future...and other things. How I wish things could be different. How I wish things could be as they were, but I know it's never going to happen, even as I know that dwelling on the past is not good either.
I know there are things in my life that I have to let God deal with before I can really go anywhere, so I think I have a pretty tough road ahead of me for a while...but at least I'll be awesome when He's done aye? : ) ... or better anyway. I've been under fire pretty hardcore lately, and I haven't really felt that I can tell anyone because no-one seems to understand exactly what I'm going through. I'm not even sure I really can, and I can't really put into words anyway, I guess. I've decided to have a little 'character growth' in my life, just trying to be a bit more stable than I have been...eg. rather than bringing everyone down with moodiness, I'm giving my circumstances to God and (trying to) rejoicing in Him anyway.
These last few weeks have been pretty hectic...I've literally not had a night to myself all week, and been surviving on an average of 7 hours sleep a night, except for last night when I had to made do on 2 because of Manifest. To be honest, the first day of manifest wasn't that great. The worship was totally awesome in the morning just after rego, but the day was a real drag after that. I don't know whether this had to do with my lack of sleep or what, but I just couldn't really get into it.
Some good music has come out recently, aww yeah....The new United album 'United We Stand' has FINALLY arrived...and totally rocks my socks, also MuteMath's self-titled debut album. Very chill. Very very chill. Fully awesome. Better than Coldplay...and that's saying something. I figured out the connection between Adam LaClave (Macrosick) and Paul Meany (MuteMath) What made them tick together as Earthsuit...Adam came up with all the funky junk rock licks and high energy whilst Paul was more focused on the mellow, arty, chill expressions in their songs. Now that they have become their own bands..it is really easy to tell where Earthsuit got it's sound from. Plumb's new album 'Chaotic Resolve' has also recently come out. I picked it up completely by accident, but it is very cool. A cross between Evanescence and Sixpence None the Richer for sound, and it works really well. Also Building 429's new album 'Rise' has been ordered...hopefully it won't take to long to get here...anyway...rather than boring you with more muso crap that no-one but myself is interested in.. I'll leave you with a proverb.
"If those who know don't say anything, then those who don't know will."
Cheerio, 'lil D-Man
Thursday 9 March 2006
My Journey of Desire
Well, over the last couple of weeks, I've learned about the importance of following your heart and the journey of desire. I have also learned how little I truly know, and how dangerous some desires...even good ones, can be if they are too strong. This is not a reason for throwing out your desires...nothing can be more destructive to your heart. It is a difficult line to follow...damned if you do and damned if you don't, but the outcomes of following your desires in the long run are much more healthy for you.
So much has happened and continues to happen in my life over the last couple of years. It is a period of change in my life, some good some bad. I know that God is sovereign and I have faith that He is in total control of my life. I DON'T know much else for sure. I pray everyday for my desires to be realized, and God's will be done in my life. Sometimes they seem so close and then other times so far. It can be a temptation to go too far when they are close, but I know that now is not the right time. My desires can seem so strong sometimes though, almost as if they were written on my soul in fire.
These times are tests, I realize, a building of character in my life. Times of growth and drawing near to the Lord. They draw out a lot of ugly characteristics from me...impatience, paranoia, anger, frustration, grief, despair, childishness. However, they come to pass, and leave with them a sense of hope for the future.
God knows my heart, and He reveals it more and more to me each day.
Cheerio, D-Man
So much has happened and continues to happen in my life over the last couple of years. It is a period of change in my life, some good some bad. I know that God is sovereign and I have faith that He is in total control of my life. I DON'T know much else for sure. I pray everyday for my desires to be realized, and God's will be done in my life. Sometimes they seem so close and then other times so far. It can be a temptation to go too far when they are close, but I know that now is not the right time. My desires can seem so strong sometimes though, almost as if they were written on my soul in fire.
These times are tests, I realize, a building of character in my life. Times of growth and drawing near to the Lord. They draw out a lot of ugly characteristics from me...impatience, paranoia, anger, frustration, grief, despair, childishness. However, they come to pass, and leave with them a sense of hope for the future.
God knows my heart, and He reveals it more and more to me each day.
Cheerio, D-Man
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